2 Male Actors (M + M) 5 - 8 Minutes Pure Comedy
The Pact in the Pantry
Full Shooting Script in Industry Courier Monospace Format
INT. TINY APARTMENT PANTRY - EVENING
A cramped pantry. Stacked containers. One narrow shelf. A BUZZING tube light.
DEEPAK (37), stained T-shirt, shorts, house slippers, holds a LADLE like a microphone.
KESHAV (55), vest and dhoti, grocery bag in hand, reading glasses perched on nose.
The pantry door SLAMS shut.
DEEPAK
Arre! Arre! Kya hua?
KESHAV
Maine kuch nahi kiya. Tu hi tha door ke paas.
DEEPAK
Main? Main to bas... entry de raha tha.
KESHAV
Entry nahi, blockage de raha tha.
Deepak tries the door. It doesn’t budge.
DEEPAK
Lock ho gaya.
KESHAV
Of course ho gaya. Ghar mein sab kuch ya to jam hota hai ya tu.
DEEPAK
Wah. Discipline wale uncle ka dialogue start.
KESHAV
Aur haramkhor bachelor ka drama bhi.
A beat.
DEEPAK
Aapne grocery bag aise ghusaya jaise pantry aapki property ho.
KESHAV
Aur tune isko store room nahi, apna emotional dumping ground bana rakha hai.
DEEPAK
Main emotional nahi, practical hoon.
KESHAV
Practical? Teri shorts dekh ke lag raha hai tu life se resign ho chuka hai.
DEEPAK
Aur aapki dhoti dekh ke lag raha hai aap 1987 mein hi stuck ho.
Keshav adjusts his glasses, offended.
KESHAV
Teri umar mein aadmi ghar basata hai.
DEEPAK
Aapki umar mein aadmi khud bas jaata hai.
KESHAV
Kya bola?
DEEPAK
Kuch nahi. Tube light ka buzz tha.
The buzzing gets louder in the silence.
KESHAV
Phone hai?
DEEPAK
Hai.
KESHAV
To call kar.
DEEPAK
Signal nahi.
KESHAV
Toh kya kaam ka hai?
DEEPAK
Aapki reading glasses se zyada kaam ka.
Keshav spots a TIFFIN BOX on the shelf.
KESHAV
Yeh kya hai?
DEEPAK
Dekh ke lag raha hai... khana.
KESHAV
Obviously khana. Kiska?
DEEPAK
Mera.
KESHAV
Mera.
Both stare at the tiffin.
DEEPAK
Aapka kaise?
KESHAV
Mera kaise? Maine hi label lagaya tha.
DEEPAK
Label? Kahan?
Keshav points to a faded sticker.
KESHAV
Yahan.
DEEPAK
Yeh to “Biryani” likha hai.
KESHAV
Toh?
DEEPAK
Toh biryani sabki hoti hai.
KESHAV
Yeh philosophy baad mein. Pehle ownership.
Deepak opens the tiffin. A glorious leftover BIRYANI aroma fills the tiny pantry.
Both inhale.
DEEPAK
...
KESHAV
...
DEEPAK
Wah.
KESHAV
Hmm.
DEEPAK
Maine socha tha aap diet pe ho.
KESHAV
Maine socha tha tu already kha chuka hoga.
DEEPAK
Main itna bhi besharam nahi hoon.
KESHAV
Tu ladle mic ki tarah pakad ke khada hai.
DEEPAK
Aap grocery bag leke court mein witness lag rahe ho.
Keshav looks at the tiffin, then at Deepak.
KESHAV
Sun.
DEEPAK
Bol.
KESHAV
Bahar jaake agar kisi ne poocha, toh bol dena door jam tha.
DEEPAK
Aur biryani?
KESHAV
Technical issue.
DEEPAK
Fair.
KESHAV
Aur ek aur baat.
DEEPAK
Kya?
KESHAV
Is baar... share karenge.
Deepak pretends to think.
DEEPAK
Main consider kar sakta hoon.
KESHAV
Consider nahi. Decide.
DEEPAK
Theek hai. But ladle meri.
KESHAV
Aur spoon mera.
DEEPAK
Deal.
Keshav extends his hand. Deepak shakes it with exaggerated seriousness.
DEEPAK
Pact in the pantry.
KESHAV
Bas ab yeh line bahar mat bolna.
DEEPAK
Kyun?
KESHAV
Family ko lag jayega hum dono responsible ho gaye.
They both laugh.
Deepak scoops biryani with the ladle. Keshav takes a spoonful.
They eat in silence, then nod at each other like seasoned criminals.
DEEPAK
Aapne bhi chhupake rakha tha na?
KESHAV
Tu bhi.
DEEPAK
Main toh bas...
KESHAV
Haan, haan. Main bhi bas.
The pantry door suddenly CREAKS open a little from outside.
Both freeze, mouths full.
DEEPAK
(whispering)
Ab?
KESHAV
(whispering)
Ab smile.
They straighten up, trying to look innocent while still chewing.
DEEPAK
(to the door, loudly)
Door jam tha!
KESHAV
Aur... technical issue tha!
They exchange a look.
Then burst into silent laughter as the BUZZING tube light continues overhead.
FADE OUT.
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