Appraisal Season

Monday morning ka Gurgaon alag hi mood me tha. Office ke basement se leke 14th floor tak, sab log unusually polite lag rahe the, jaise kisi ne overnight sabke personalities par “soft skills” ka filter laga diya ho. Pantry me chai lene gaya toh Aarav ko sabse pehle yeh odd cheez dikhi ki jo log normally ek dusre ke coffee mugs bhi silently judge karte the, wahi ab “Arre, tumhara kaam kaisa chal raha hai?” aur “Need any help?” bol rahe the.

Aarav Mehta ne apni chai ka sip liya aur bas itna socha, Something is off. Aur sach mein, office me kuch toh off tha. Noida side se commute karke aane wali Neha Sood, jo usually seedha point pe baat karti thi, aaj smile ke saath “Good morning, Aarav, hope you had a restful weekend” bol rahi thi. Aarav ko laga ya toh office me HR audit aa gaya hai, ya phir appraisal season start ho gaya hai.

Phir uske phone par calendar ping aaya. Subject: Appraisal Discussion – Project Team Organizer: Neha Sood Time: Thursday, 11:30 AM

Bas. Aarav ne screen ko do second tak dekha, phir chai ka cup thoda aur tightly pakad liya. Appraisal. Matlab ab office ka asli season shuru. Jahan sabka asli face thoda blur ho jata hai aur sabka “team player” version HD mein aa jata hai.

Usne around dekha. Sanjay Verma, sales head, corridor me aise chal raha tha jaise office uska personal runway ho. Loud voice, broad smile, aur har do minute me kisi na kisi ko naam se bulakar “How’s life, champ?” type energy. Log usko waise bhi bhav nahi dete the, but appraisal ke time pe Sanjay ki extra helpfulness ek alag level pe chali jaati thi. Aaj woh ek junior ko bol raha tha, “Bhai, tu tension mat le, main hoon na.” Aarav ne mann hi mann kaha, Haan, tum ho na. Apni image ke liye sabse pehle.

Woh apni desk pe aaya aur laptop khola. Inbox me already teen mails pade the—“Quick help needed”, “Can you review this?”, aur “Just a small favor.” Small favor. Yeh do words appraisal season me dangerous hote hain. Inka matlab hota hai: Mera kaam kar do, aur badle me main yaad rakhunga… shayad, agar rating ka topic aaya toh.

Aarav normally quiet aur efficient tha. Kaam time pe, ghalat baat pe “noted,” aur drama se door. Office me aise logon ko aksar log “reliable” bol dete hain, but problem yeh thi ki reliable log invisible bhi ho jaate hain. Aur invisible logon ka appraisal kabhi kabhi spreadsheet me kho jaata hai. Aarav ko yeh baat pata thi. Isliye last two weeks se woh suddenly over-helpful ho gaya tha.

Usne ek junior ke report deck me help kar di. Ek colleague ke client mail ko polish kar diya. Ek aur team ke tracker me data fill kar diya, bina pooche ki woh actually uska kaam bhi nahi tha. Har help ke saath uske dimaag me ek chhota sa calculator chal raha tha—Ye mention hoga? Ye review me aayega? Kya Neha notice karegi?

Pantry me ussi waqt Sanjay aa gaya. “Arre Aarav, tu toh hero nikla yaar,” usne khaas loud tone me bola, taaki side ke do log bhi sun lein. “Suna hai tune Riya ka deck bhi fix kar diya? Team spirit ho toh aisa.” Aarav ne halka sa smile kiya. “Bas help kar di.” Sanjay ne shoulder pat kiya. “Exactly! That’s what I like. Logon ko lift karna chahiye.”

Aarav ko almost hansi aa gayi. Sanjay ka “lift” usually tab yaad aata tha jab usko apni image ko thoda aur polished banana hota tha. Office me sabko pata tha ki Sanjay ki kindness selective hai. Jahan usko credit mil sakta tha, wahan woh “supportive” hota tha. Jahan actual messy work hota tha, wahan uske calls suddenly unreachable ho jaate the.

Tabhi Neha pantry ke door pe aayi. “Guys,” woh bolti hai, “Thursday ke liye apne achievements aur blockers bhej dena. Please, concise and honest.” Honest word par Aarav ka eyebrow thoda upar chala gaya. Neha ne shayad notice kiya, ya shayad usne notice karne ka pretend kiya. “Seriously,” woh thoda softer tone me boli, “I need the right context for the review cycle.”

Aarav ne bas “Sure” bola. Neha ki tone polite thi, but Aarav ko uske face pe woh pressure clearly dikh raha tha jo manager log usually carry karte hain aur office me kisi ko dikhne nahi dete. Upper management ko pleasing bhi karna hai, team ko motivate bhi karna hai, aur saath me ratings ka kaanta bhi sambhalna hai. Mid-level manager hona bhi ek alag hi treadmill hai.

Do din tak office me fake favors ka avalanche chalta raha. Koi kisi ke liye coffee la raha tha, koi suddenly “Let me help with that deck” bol raha tha, koi senior ke overused joke pe zyada zor se hans raha tha. Aarav ne toh ek point pe dekha ki Sanjay ne lunch order bhi “team ke liye” place kar diya hai. “Bhai sabko ek jaisa,” Sanjay ne announce kiya, “I care about fairness.” Aarav ne under-breath murmur kiya, “Fairness aur tum? Rare combo.”

Thursday ko calibration room ka naam sunte hi office me ek alag hi silence aa gayi. Ye woh room tha jahan real decisions bante the, aur baahar wale bas guess karte rehte the ki andar kya hua. Ritika Bansal, HR/People Ops wali, hamesha cheerful rehti thi, par calibration ke time uske smile me bhi ek carefulness aa jaati thi. Aarav ne usse coffee machine ke paas roka.